M's adventure

M went on a high adventure with the scouts, and man!  He had a blast! They went to the Big Horn Mountains with a hard core wilderness survival guide. For the 3 day survival part, they each got a wool blanket, a cup of whole wheat, a cup of rice, a can of V8, a can of tuna, an enameled metal mug and the clothes on their backs.  Oh, and a LIVE chicken.  That's it.  If they were, as the guide called it, "mamsy pansy pants" then they could bring their pocket knives and ponchos.  M did NOT bring a knife or poncho, in case you wondered.  

The boys were really glad that he came along because no one, I mean no one, can start a fire without matches OR flint like M can. Get this.  The guide taught them how to make a knife out of a rock (?!?!?) and used that knife to scrape fibers off a particular kind of plant.  They took those fibers and twisted their own twine which they attached to both ends of a stick to make a little bow to rub 2 sticks together caveman style to make fire!!!!  If you could get a fire going this way you won free access to the guide's 5 lb M&M treat bag.  If you could make fire with flint and steel you got one hand full of M&Ms and the rest just got shamed.  In the end, my manly M was the only one with free access.  When the boys were grinding their wheat on a rock for breakfast, he made a grand show of putting a M&Ms in his cracked wheat cereal. :)

M built a sleeping shelter that the boys pronounced to be “wicked sick”, which is actually a really good thing.  The boys mostly slept huddled in their blankets around the campfire.

claustrophobia anyone?

They hiked up to a peak to find the wreckage of an old bomber. M was the only leader to scramble up the last nearly vertical boulder and snow fields to get to any airplane parts. The boys even got worn out before he did. 

I thought the photos of the boys with their live chickens and then gutting them were hilarious. (Mainly because I wasn't the one up to my elbows in warm guts.)  

See the huge hunk cut out of this kids's shirt?  When M asked him what happened, the kid just shrugged and said, “Toilet paper.”!

They ground down their V8 pull tab on a rock until it was a hook shape.  They used more plant fibers to make really really thin twine.  Now here's the best part, they made glue by heating a crazy concoction of pine gum, ashes, and moose poop!  They glued the hook to the thin twine, tied it to a stick and voila! a fishing pole with tackle.  M cleverly used one of the feathers from his chicken to disguise his handmade fishing hook as a tied fly.  (The guide was very excited by this as it was the first time he'd ever seen it done!)  Here's the out of focus photo to prove it.

And yes, my handsome and handy M caught a fish with his handmade tackle.  That my friends, put him in an elite group with only 2 other people who their guide has EVER seen catch a fish with their own handmade gear in all his 15 years of teaching survival skills. 

Zombie Apocalypse?  Bring it on!  This man can take care of his family without the rest of civilization!  He came home so excited about the whole survival business that he is thinking about developing a class where he can teach these skills with all the science behind them (like why moose poop glue sticks or the thermal insulation properties of a 2 foot pile of pine needles on your sleeping shelter etc.) at the universty.  He is going to call the course "Neanderthal Engineering", and I predict it would fill up pretty quickly.  (here's where I'd make that Tim Allen tough guy growl if I could.)